anando

Subal Sarkar, my once upon a time dance Guru, recently passed away.
When I read this news, it brought back all the old memories. I remembered the towering figure of Dada capturing the stage with his loving, smiling charismatic persona.
I still remember as a young kid that I was, I would many times forget my own steps watching him moving as a force on the stage. He was a very inspiring teacher and a very mesmerizing dancer. 
Looking back I now wonder what was so memorable about Dada, his dance or his lovingness or his pure humanness?
His daughter Kishu (Krishna) and I were of the same age and Dada treated me just like his own daughter. I used to spend a lot of time at his home with Kishu. For some time Kishu & Vishu (that is me) was inseparable team. Dada and his wife both would love me like their own child and would even scold me if I did something wrong, just like they would scold Kishu. I felt very loved and cared in their presence. I experienced his lovingness as a father.
In our troop we had Dada who was a Bengali speaking fluent Marathi, singers like Zenu and Chaand who were Muslims singing Marathi Powadas written by Shahir Amar Sheikh and dancers like me, Rohini who came from a complete atheist background. Dada always played a wonderful leader, father role in keeping us together. The way he respected Chandrakantji who was oldest amongst us and took care of me, the youngest in the group; we felt as if we were a family.

Dada as a Guru was very strict. He would make us practice a single step so many times no matter how tired we were until we perfected it. No excuses were accepted for imperfection. He would not allow anything less than perfection from anyone including his own daughter.

While being performers on stage he taught me to respect the art in myself. For him a dancer is an artist first and a performer later. Self-respect was most important quality for becoming a great dancer. I still remember once I got hurt in one of the performances while dancing on stage. My foot started bleeding and I wanted to go inside so a bit confused on how I should exit I just bent down and did a gesture like doing a mujara (touching my hand to my head) and walked back. Dada did not miss this. As soon as the dance was over he came to me and asked me how I am and made sure I am OK but immediately scolded me for the action I did. He said we are not to do such a gesture, he told me that you are a Kathak dancer not an entertainer. As a child I did not fully understand why he scolded me because at that time I thought that I did a very smart thing of not walking out from stage but gracefully exiting. Then why Dada scolded me? I felt he was so unfair to me. But I know now that his scolding that day had a deep impact on my tender mind. After that day I saw my art with great respect and felt very honorable about myself. And even though I did not become a professional dancer in my life, this teaching stayed with me forever.

I learnt Kathak from my dance teacher Ghatge guruji but Subaldada taught me the spirit of dance.
Grace with true inner strength expressed in a flowing body was my learning from his teaching.
I remember him saying our body already has the rhythm and music, a good dancer expresses this rhythm and music and allows it to flow through the body.

Later when I decided to quit dance and join amateur stage, I told him so. I could see that he felt sad, he did say that I am a very good dancer and that I must not stop dancing but he encouraged me for exploring other things too. It almost felt as if he knew that it was just a passing fancy for me & blessed me lovingly.

I am sure many students like me would have got Dada’s teachings and went away leaving him or his teaching. Then why he gave so much attention to teaching kids like me? Why did he waste his time? Well that was the spirit of a true Guru in him I guess. He gave his best to every child in whom he saw a great potential of becoming a dancer without any expectations.

My tribute to Subaldada may not be valid as a dancer because I do not have any credentials in that area but my tribute to him today is for the Guru in him as his shishya.
While working in the area of spirituality and educating children and young parents, I am unknowingly using the sanskaras I received from Subaldada. They have left deep impressions on me. It is from the respect and love I feel for him even after so many years make me realize what a great Guru Shri Subal Sarkar was.

Dada, you will always live in my heart and my life as my Guru.

P.s. It is dada’s blessings that this article which I wrote 5 years back got me reconnected with my childhood friend Dr.Kishu Pal after so many years.